Fear is a universal and difficult experience. Fear can prevent us from experiencing life and hope, and keep us away from new experiences and relationships. Yet it can also be the catalyst that helps us turn in a new direction.
I remember one of the first times I was truly afraid. I was about six years old living in Saskatoon and I had made a neighbourhood friend. He was a cool kid with bleach blond hair, and I remember that he had a real BMX bike. He was awesome. He lived just down the street and around the corner. This was back in the day when kids could roam the neighbourhood freely, and we lived in a simple neighbourhood where most neighbours looked out for each other. One day he invited me over to his house; I remember going into his backyard and all around it was overgrown and rough. Sitting in among the broken lawn mowers and on mismatched patio furniture sat my friend’s dad and some of his friends. They were big, maybe drunk, laughing and rowdy. I was nervous but followed my friend in. Then one of the men, maybe his dad, scared me by tossing a drink at me and yelled, “hey kid, want a beer?” and all the men burst out laughing. I was petrified and did the only thing I knew, I ran. I shot out the back yard, down the street, around the corner, and right into my room. What had I just experienced?
Months later my friend had a birthday and invited me to his back yard with some other friends. I was so afraid that the men would be there again, that I would be made fun of, and that I would be running home afraid, again. So I pretended to be sick and stayed in bed. After the party, the boy came with cake and left it on my front step.
I felt sad, afraid and shameful. I regretted running and hiding.
Fear sends us in the opposite direction. It causes is to hide, to cover up, and avoid others. It is a powerful life-shaping emotion. Perhaps that is why one of the most frequent commands, “do not be afraid,” appears over 300 times in the Bible, in one form or another. God was always comforting those who were on the run, hiding, shameful, nervous, and afraid.
Today a rowdy bunch of guys does not make me afraid, like it did thirty years ago. But I still have fears. Will this relationship be ok, will that project work out, will the resources be there when I need them, and will everything be alright? Fear is constantly nudging us to hide, cover up, or avoid. But it doesn’t need to take root in us.
We’re invited into a life where fear does not chase us away. We are learning to step confidently into our neighbourhoods, into new relationships, and into uncharted territory. We are comforted by the loving care of God who, for millennia, has said to his beloved people: do not be afraid.
May you know the hope that comes from living in the safety of God’s care, open to new people and new experiences in the world around you. It may be that just beyond that fearful experience you will find new life and joy. Take the step, you are loved and never alone.
